Skip to main content

Being Married to a Narcissist


Narcissist personality disorder is defined as a mental health condition in which people have an unreasonably high sense of their own importance. They need and seek too much attention and want people to admire them. People with this disorder may lack the ability to understand or care about the feelings of others. But behind this mask of extreme confidence, they are not sure of their self-worth and are easily upset by the slightest criticism.

Being around a narcissist takes a huge toll on your on mental health and if you are married to one it could do even more damage. The term narcissist gets tossed around a lot nowadays, but it is important to understand that this is a personality disorder which means there are symptoms you can look for.

  • Wanting constant admiration
  • Expecting favorable treatment
  • Believing oneself to be superior to others
  • Taking advantage of other others to get their own needs met
  • Only spending time with others who are perceived as highly successful
  • Not able to empathize with others

Mental health disorders are usually determined on a spectrum, and it is the same with narcissism. Your spouse can show one to two signs or all of the signs listed above. He/she may come off confident and knowing everything, but in reality they are very fragile and have some trauma of rejection from their past.

With that being said, being married to a narcissist can have negative effects on you and your life. When someone is constantly putting you down, it is safe to say you won’t be satisfied with your relationship and there will be conflict. Couples, friends, and family argue, it isn’t unheard of. However, if you are married to a narcissist fighting can happen on a daily basis. Narcissists are extremely sensitive to the smallest things and feed off attention. If they are not receiving that then it will cause immediate conflict.

In addition to your actual relationship, you will begin to endanger relationships with your friends and family. A narcissist will do everything they can to isolate you from others. Their goal is to have all your time and attention, while also cutting you off from people who may recognize this abusive behavior. This will cause you to question your self-esteem, relationships, loss of independence, and other underlying emotions. You can begin to experience depression, anxiety, PTSD, and other mental health conditions you didn’t have prior.

If you are reading this and thinking you may be married to a narcissist, you are probably wondering if they can change. The answer is it isn’t impossible, but personality disorders are behavior patterns that can be very difficult to unlearn. However, your spouse can seek therapy to help change his behavior for the sake of your marriage. At the end of the day, it is up to your spouse to understand there is a problem and be willing to seek alternative routes to get better.

Our experienced attorney’s at Brown Dutton & Crider are here to help you in any way. Contact us at 770-422-4241 to schedule a consultation.